Suzanne

Suzanne takes you down to her place near the river
You can hear the boats go by, you can spend the night forever
And you know that she's half-crazy but that's why you want to be there
And she feeds you tea and oranges that come all the way from China
And just when you mean to tell her that you have no love to give her
Then he gets you on her wavelength
And she lets the river answer that you've always been her lover

And you want to travel with her, and you want to travel blind
And you know that she will trust you
For you've touched her perfect body with your mind

And Jesus was a sailor when he walked upon the water
And he spent a long time watching from his lonely wooden tower
And when he knew for certain only drowning men could see him
He said all men will be sailors then until the sea shall free them
But he himself was broken, long before the sky would open
Forsaken, almost human, he sank beneath your wisdom like a stone

And you want to travel with him, and you want to travel blind
And you think you maybe you'll trust him
For he's touched your perfect body with her mind

Now, Suzanne takes your hand and she leads you to the river
She's wearing rags and feathers from Salvation Army counters
And the sun pours down like honey on our lady of the harbor
And she shows you where to look among the garbage and the flowers
There are heroes in the seaweed, there are children in the morning
They are leaning out for love and they wil lean that way forever
While Suzanne holds her mirror

And you want to travel with her, and you want to travel blind
And you know that you can trust her
For she's touched your perfect body with her mind

A morning playlist

Of all the playlists for the morning, this is among my favorite. On this list, if pushed to the wall and asked to pick what are my favorites, #2, #3 and #5 will be it. But that is unfair. Because the playlist is an incredible one for me. I guess much of it has to do with that Sanskrit is an incredibly beautiful language. To get it right takes much effort and learning. Much credit must go to the singer 

1. Om Shanti Om 

2. Antarjami Purakh Bidate 

3. Sarvesham Svastir Bhavatu 

4. Tan Man Shaant 

5. Lokah Samastah Sukhino Bhavantu 

6. Gayatri Mantra 

7. Asatoma Sadgamaya 

8. Shanti Mantra

The other playlist I really like is about an hour long. Of that Hum hi Hum and Om Guru Deva Namo are among my favorites.  

Grown men don't cry

I don't know what led me to this talk. It was sometime ago that I had picked up Paul Kalanithi's book When Breath Becomes Air.

In this talk, his wife Lucy reflects on how the two of them got together, their life, the calls they took as he lay dying, what it is like for her now that he is gone, and why did they decide to have a child even as he was dying. I must admit to feeling a lump in my throat as I heard her speak.

A lot many people find the idea of death very difficult to deal with -- they want to turn the other way. But it is something I think I have wrapped my head around. I came very close to dying seven years ago. Nobody thought I'd make it past the portal I had gotten into. I don't remember all of what happened then. But I certainly do know what happened as dad died a little over a year ago, and all the thoughts that went through my mind. 

One line though kept going through my mind. Grown men don't cry. So even as dad was dying, I sat and wrote that out why, Grown men don't cry.

And I'd signed off with the lines of that song that prompted it all, 

I’m sittin’ here with my kids and my wife
And everything that I hold dear in my life
We say grace and thank the LordGot so much to be thankful for
Then it’s up the stairs and off to bed and my little girl says “I haven’t had my story yet.” 
And everything weighin’ on my mind disappears just like that
When she lifts her head off her pillow and says, “I Love You Dad” 
I don’t know why they say grown men don’t cry
I don’t know why they say grown men don’t cry